You know sometimes in my own life, I feel I get too accommodating towards the people close to me — friends and relatives. I go out of my way to resolve conflicts even when I know that it is not my fault. I generally do not like bad situations persisting and try to resolve them. What I have ended up doing is that people in many cases expect that I will continue to do that. I will continue to give in no matter how unreasonable the demand. I think it is high time that I started dealing with situations in the same practical way but giving myself the leeway to feel hurt, show anger and to make sure that the other person understands his/her mistake. Otherwise, despite acknowledging that “oh, I was wrong” and ” that I can be very mean when angry”; I see absolutely no change in behavior.
I also have to know how much to bend, where exactly does my happiness lie? I think the good thing about me is that I am open to criticism and am able to meaningfully use it too. Just that sometimes I go overboard in accommodating people and that has to stop. I am not perfect and yes, I do make mistakes. But this is just the way I am and way better than most others I know. Maybe I do a lot more thinking than others or maybe it is just a refection of my state of mind :).
Don’t get too concerned :). It is just a personal rant. Sometimes, letting off steam really helps.
Writting down makes a person light.
One should try his/her best to resolve the conflict. 🙂
Thanks Chandrika. I agree!
I agree…but sometimes revolting is necessary. Too much bending is bad for yourself.
Finding that right balance between giving in and holding back is so difficult, Manika. It changes with every situation and your frame of mind as well.
These conflicts are always there as no one can be black or white human behaviour is ever changing & evolving and its okay to introspect at times and put new definitions around you. And its also ok to be mellow at times and to be aggresive at times, as no two situations are same.So use your judgement and do best what is suited with no repentances….
@Manu — Yes, responses are always based upon situations. The whole problem is that things are not black or white 🙂