Cussing to me was something I was always uncomfortable with. In my normal lingo, I hardly ever curse except when I am driving :). Even then my gaalis (curses) are pretty mild. I was more of a prude when younger looking down upon people who were excessively bad mouthed. Even my male friends I don’t recall cussed in the presence of us females. Though, it was an open secret that they used the choicest ones when in male company :).
Then later, I realized there was another dimension to cussing. It actually could be a harmless and a camaraderie thing. When I see hubby chatting up his old pals, the colorful language is not meant in a harmful way but as a mark of their intimacy. I realized that my objection was mostly to do with the intention behind the cuss. So, I became more tolerant of it and also enjoyed it in movies and serials. Yet, males cussing in front of unknown females is derogatory and rude.
Then I had kids, and it was important that they don’t pick up words at a young age which might shock onlookers :). So, both of us were careful with our language around them, me more so than hubby. But, seriously who was I kidding!
The other day, I was sitting and watching Ben 10 with Sid and I heard expletives there of the screw, f*** kind. He comes back home from the playground everyday, sometimes confused about the meaning of certain words and phrases, some of them I might not know the meanings of myself :). And Nat Geo was having a graphic program about bra sizes that Sid was watching with a lot of interest. Frankly, there was nothing objectionable in that program except for my old mindset :). But, I sat with him and watched the latter part with him. It really is so strange that I am modern about most things and yet conservative about many others. The point I am trying to make that even if I close my eyes, the times will continue to change. There is a fine line between teaching kids not to cuss in front of elders or women and asking them not to cuss at all. Because, it will happen sooner or later with the exposure they have today.
I am happy that these days in movies like “No one Killed Jessica” and “Delhi Belly,” the language used is colorful, real and in your face, you know the MC BC type of lingo. Since these are certified A, these are much better than the so-called family movies with all kinds of obscenity. I prefer the openness to the double entendres any day that Hindi movies are notorious for and the horribly vulgar songs that all kids are exposed to. I enjoyed “Delhi Belly” with its expletives and all, and I am certainly not apologizing for that.
Btw, yesterday I took my dog for vaccination to the vet accompanied by my sons. The dog was going crazy in the car; Sid and Gautam were yelling at the top of their voices trying to control him, and I was trying to avoid crazy drivers and the craziness in the back seat, so I cussed loudly many times. Sid was like mom, what did you say? I was like “dog.” No before that! And, I went red faced. F***. So there…
so you ddidn’t mention any of your cusses here.was it that bad really?!:)anyways heard a lot about delhi belly ,should go and watch it.
I agree with what you have said, but still am not comfortable with cussing on the screen with family around
I want to really know some of the popular cuss words used in your mother tongue, other than the famous ‘D K Bose’ thing..
@raji Of course not! Best left for your imagination :). I already said that mine are pretty harmless. Yeah, if you have the stomach for it, go watch DB.
@bbsearchingself Very true, me not comfortable with family around either. Luckily, both these movies were A rated.
@Tomz For that you have to catch hold of some North Indian guy :).
a few cusss words in the post would have been educative
*sigh
I havent seen the movie…But I know the swearing words used nowadays in bollywood movies…
may be they copy the F word from hollywood But its looks vulgar …
I am frm old school and believe in clean lingo …
..swearing words are very popular in American slang…But when you translate them in hindi ..its like
Sooooooooo vulgar!
@Sorcerer Hi, long time! Looks like everyone is curious to know the cusses instead of the actual post :). Well, I don’t like cussing in front of strangers, you see :).
@Harman Yes, some curses and gaalis sound really vulgar in Hindi. But, these are not translated, these are actual ones that exist like they do in any other language. I am definitely not saying that it is okay to be bad mouthed.
Haa I enjoyed Delhi Belly. I dont think I liked that movie because of the usage of cuss words. It was aesthetically done.
Swearing has become a norm, people dont actually mean it when they use those words. At the same time, I believe there should be an awareness as to when not to use them.
u reminded me of the time when i suddenly heard my daughter (then 4) singing d “Who the fuck is Alice” song. i went red, she must’ve heard me singing it. 4 her it was jus another song!
ur sons must’ve wondered in d car dat day, “Mom?! our mom n d cuss word!!ohh”
@Insignia I liked the movie because it was very real in what it wanted to show. No hidden or double meanings. And it was funny. I agree with the second part of what you say. There must be an awareness about when it is not cool to curse.
@Sujatha haha funny. Yes, indeed, my sons must have felt that for sure :).
Rachna: I could actually relate myself to this post. Sometimes cussing can be a breather 😉
Yes, we have to be very careful when kids are around..
Using the words in everyday life has become a common thing now, But I still did not like delhi belly for the explicits used ..
I know when we friends meet there is a lot of swearing and all but as u say its all in Good terms .. the same word said othewise will result in WAR..
The problem i had with the movie is that htey did it too much, I have seen some hollywwod movies but for some reason the words are used esthetically if you know what i mean..
Maybe i am a hypocrite but sometimes even when conversing with friends in india its a different feeling when talking in native language i mean the cursing then in English ..
englsih has a flare to it F*** seems politer then BC MC…
Bikram’s
@Spicy Sweet Yes true! Especially when you are used to being just a couple living alone :).
@Bikram Whether you like a movie or not is actually not debatable because each one has different sensibilities, so I totally understand what you are trying to say. The other things I agree to, cussing does sound better for that matter even anatomy parts sound better in English than in say Hindi or Punjabi.
dont know why, but I am not comfortable with cussing and thats for both men and women,neither I do, nor I like to listen.
@Renu I understand what you are saying.
While driving in Bangalore roads cussing comes easily to my husband, but his window glasses would be up and the other person’s window too would be up, I sometimes wonder what does he get by using such language, and he would cuss in English.
Is the movie Delhi Belly really good?
@rama And,it’s actually preferable if you window panes are up, that way you release your frustration yet don’t end up annoying anyone. With these days of road rage leading to terrible scuffles, this is the right thing to do. I don’t know if you drive, but if you do and in Bangalore, you have to cuss or you are a saint :).
I really enjoyed Delhi Belly but then I don’t know if you can take the in-your-face language, bawdiness and other stuff :).
Good post from your point of view Rachna..
But nowadays, we see cusses even trying to become part of our regular culture. Its like without cuss, there’s nothing. It can be humourous until we agree the major thought with open mind. But, if something really goes wrong..??? 🙂 🙂 🙂 And kids in new generation are no more innocent. They know each and every thing and i can even say they know more than grown people.
As comes to DELHI BELLY its an awesome movie….Beyond all critical reviews the concept itself is wonderful.
Was I reading about my family?? 😀
It’s exactly the same case with us!!
And Delhi Belli… I just loved it… I guess there is too much of fuss about the cuss words in the movie, when it is a part of our (Indian) normal lingo!
Harmless cussing is ok.
But children pick them up faster than we think.
@Indian Lilliput Hey, welcome to my space. Yes, kids these days are much more “knowledgeable” because of the excessive exposure. They do know a lot. Yet as parents, we do not want to unnecessarily expose them to many things knowingly. Agree about Delhi Belly, really enjoyed the concept.
@shilpa Oh, that is interesting to know :). Some people make too much of the cussing but it was excessive :).
@dr. antony Doc, with kids they will pick up even the harmless words, which would sound horrible from their young mouths :). That is the only thing I am worried about.
hey just thinking and laughing at the way things r moving after reading this post..good one buddy
Shobha de also wrote one article on cussing last sunday in TOI.
I enjoyed the movie too but honestly too much cussing made me a little queasy. Maybe because we are not used to it and the younger gen is.
@Ramesh 🙂
@Alka Yes, I read that column too. Like you, I am not too comfortable with cussing especially when family is around. Of course, it is hep for the teenagers.
I don’t cuss. I don’t have a problem with people cussing when they are justified doing it (with friends-for fun, when someone is damn frustrated). I only have a problem with people who do it to sound cool. How uncool is that!
And nice post, 🙂
@Destiny’s child Absolutely aptly put! Not cool but otherwise fine.
My mindset is similar. Even I was rather prudish in the past. Now i’ve gotten over it. But as you say, if strangers use profanity in my presence, I do not really apprecaiate it. And yes, it is better to have movies like Delhi-Belly certified A. I think movies that show things like violence against women and children (slapping a so called ‘errant wife’ to bring her to her senses etc) are far worse and should be banned.
Very true Deepa.