The most satisfying relationship in our lives is the one we have with ourselves. I’ve seen extremely good looking men and women, intelligent men and women who are fun to be with hating themselves with a vengeance. And I wonder why? As obvious as it may seem, most of us don’t really share a good relationship with our self. It’s our weight, our looks, our complexion or the fact that we may not be as successful as we desire that may make us curse ourselves. Sometimes, we seem to have everything and yet we are unhappy within ourselves. I think it is time to make the effort to love and appreciate ourselves, warts and all. It took me some time to truly appreciate ‘me’, but now there is no looking back. Trust me loving yourself opens new doors and in way means that you are vain or selfish.
The younger me was much more docile though outspoken. I was way too accommodating of other people’s views and letting their opinions dictate my behaviour. But over the decades, I’ve become more self-assured and less caring of the opinion of those who don’t matter. I also have no qualms in claiming time and space for myself. And now I constantly appreciate my body for how it fights back against all odds and my being for doing the right things. In my own small way, I am pretty proud of how I’ve turned out as a human being. Loving yourself means putting the focus on your health, your well-being, your nutrition, your sleep and your peace of mind. A lot of women neglect that, unfortunately. Here are 5 reasons why you need to put yourself first:
Your Work will Appreciate It
Most women are overworked especially those who handle both professional work and home chores. Not properly organizing your work, assigning priority to tasks, using time blocks for your work and chores will just end up making you frazzled and anxious and ruining your productivity. If you are calm and relaxed, you can finish the work faster with better focus. You can also switch between chores without losing your mind. And you will understand how and when to take breaks to rejuvenate. So having adequate sleep, a filling breakfast and other meals and a peaceful state of mind are non-negotiable on a daily basis.
Your Body Will Love You
Let’s be conscious of the fact that we need to give back to the bodies that we put through so much stress and work on a daily basis. Like an empty fuel tank, it will shut down if we don’t take good care of it. So invest in your gym or exercise time. Don’t skip meals and don’t feel guilty for taking off to de-stress. You deserve it to have a fully functional body and mind.
Your Family and Friends Deserve It
Tired women are unhappy and overwhelmed. Not only is that a recipe for disaster when you are snapping at everyone around you but it also gets precious little work done. Not to mention that you don’t make for good company. Invest in your me-time and ask for help when you are unwell or overworked. Also give your attention to the task at hand. This will only happen when you have taken care of yourself.
You Owe it to Your Happiness
There are times when as a wife or a mother, I felt that I give much more than I get in return. And often it is my fault as well. I recently wrote a post on why women need to switch off. And one of the points I dwelled upon is s that as women somehow we are not wired to just let go. We are doing so much in our head that we are unable to enjoy the moment we are experiencing. I have started working in this direction. When I schedule my work properly and handle my household duties well, I feel happy and content. Sometimes, it means eliciting help and I am no longer shy of asking for it. Also if I am not up for something, I say it. Either way, I am safeguarding my health and happiness now.
Because You are Worth It
Just like the famous commercial went, tell yourself that you are worth it. Don’t be guilty to go out with your girlfriends leaving your kids behind. Don’t feel bad to do something solo and not spend that time with your partner. Don’t worry about the dirty dishes or clothes piling at home if you are out on a movie outing, you’ll ruin the pleasure. Live and enjoy in the moment. Yes, you need to get rid of that guilt in doing something pleasurable. Do it because you deserve it. And you will find yourself smiling more. The world will not stop spinning if you pay it a little less attention. Loosen up and seize the moment.
I hope all of us start putting ourselves first, taking care of ourselves and falling in love with ourselves. It is a relationship that will reap you rich dividends.
Would love to hear your thoughts on the same.
Featured Pic and Pinned pic courtesy Shutterstock
Every person needs to read this powerful post,Rachna.
It truly starts with ourselves and all change is an inside job.
So glad I read this.
Thanks, Mayuri. Glad you could connect with the post.
True, true, true. So often I just become frustrated when I don’t find the time for myself or to take care of myself. I’m of no use to anyone then. So, yes it’s so important for us to put ourselves first. So very important.
Absolutely, Naba. Young mothers like you really need to take time out for themselves to recharge. I am glad that you are doing that.
Like you, it took me sometime to appreciate the real me. But once I did, there was no looking back. No matter how much I love some one, I will never do anything that is against my beliefs or something that I’m uncomfortable with. I have learnt to take care of myself and my body very well and I feel so good and happy because of it.
Today, I love myself the most and that helps me give more love to the people around me.
Every woman needs to read this post, Rachna!
I am so proud of you, Soumya, for the person that you are. I am so glad that you connected with the post as I knew you would. Thanks for reading.
Totally agree with this. Else I would be losing my mind and my sanity if my world revolved solely around other people.
I learnt to put myself first after a health setback last year and have been very conscious about it since. Sleeping well, eating right and prioritising work, health are very crucial. Health is everything. Without that, we have nothing. That begins with self care and self love.
Well said, Rachna.
I am glad to hear it, Shailaja. It is liberating in a way to focus on one’s own self in a guilt free manner. Thanks for reading.
“Because you are worth it”; its the phrase that I try to keep repeating to myself. I couldn’t agree more with what you have written here. Appreciate yourself before others can appreciate you.
Thanks Erika. Glad you connected with the post.
Yes yes yes to everything. I feel we become better versions of ourselves when we spend time with ourselves. I function better, enjoy work and time with the kids too.
Absolutely! You said it.
Agree with you completely! Women in the process of taking care of their loved ones forget to take care of themselves. And the results of ignoring themselves has far more negative consequences. Self-love is the foundation on which we build a happy life, not only for ourselves but also for ourselves.
I need my Me-Time after the chores and work and when I dont get that, it affects everything around me, negatively!
Absolutely agree with all of your points, but especially the one about being there for others. I can only be my best of others if I’m my best for myself.
Women inherently have this nature of ptuting everything else first instead of themselves. For example my mom in law would often sit quiet at the dinner table, taking in extremely small morsels of food. It took me a great amount of time to figure out that, she would first want to the family to finish eating and only if there is enough would she fill her stomach. NO amount of convincing her that a family must share whatever is on the table, make her change her behaviour. I realised its a sort of conditioning, where she believed a woman must put others first and herself last. Putting yourself first surely doesnt mean you are being selfish. It just means that you love yourself as much as you love the others 🙂
You have lots of good advice here.
So true Rachna, every word you wrote is a wonderful reminder for me of how we need to take proper care of ourselves in the various roles that we play in our lives, without feeling guilty about it. The conditioning where the society has labelled self care to be selfish and self centered is something that needs to be changed for the better. Great post, pinning it too!
Self-love is very important. But, we sacrifice it for several reasons.
Agree with your points, Rachna.
Loving oneself is so important! The Charity begins at home:)